HELLO!!!!
First things first,
The blog: I've had so many plans and ideas to get this thing going but I never seem to follow through. I feel like there are so many things up on the internet that it really wouldn't benefit from what I could produce. Everything I could do has been done before and what is to make mine any different. That's not to say I can't have an outlet though so I'm making another post.
Me: The altered outlook is not going as smoothly as I would have liked but this is okay. I'm still trying to embrace my tips. Some of them are harder then others but they are still there, I have used them in decision making and they have helped. Life is not at its peak but I definitely think I have handled things better.
I have been watching some vlogbrothers videos and they, along with some of my recent experiences, have got me thinking. There are so many videos and things that circulate that talk about self image and how to get people to like you, asking questions about relationships and general adolescent life experiences: first kiss, first date, boyfriends, girlfriends etc. etc. I being on the older side of adolescence verging on adulthood couldn't help but draw parallels with these people who were asking John and Hank Green, married men, about their teenage love life. No offence to the Green brothers, I love then to death, but WHY?
Surprisingly enough they had some pretty great answers that sang true to me but I really don't think that in today's society teenagers are going to embrace their way of thinking. We are constantly being thrown this shit about giving young people a better set of role models and calls for anti bullying and how we should love ourselves for all our imperfections but its all crap. How much of it is actually effective. None. We can't just eliminate this way of thinking that has been implanted in our human nature. For centuries people have been dealing with these problems, it is nothing new, there will always be some image that we strive for.
Our self worth is based on others. There is no denying it. There are always things we are going to do to try and catch the eye of someone else, to try and get people to like us and when other people like us, we like ourselves. Josh Thomas, an Australian comedian has started a conversation on pivot relating to his show "please like me" where he said the things that were wrong with him and other people have responded doing the same. There are so many projects like this and they are great, they really are. Again I love Josh Thomas, he is an awesome person but it is still all a ploy. We use these things to seem brave and accessible but the fact is: yeah there is something wrong with all of us but by pointing these things out we are not embracing them or dealing with them. We are just bringing them to our attention. There is no need to love everything about ourselves, we can not change who we are and if we do we will always find something new to not like. Isn't that what other people are for? To make perfect our imperfections and to distract us from them.
You reach a point in your life where all the messages projected on us about self love make sense. You start to realise what you've been living like and that none of it matters. Sure you go back and forth with it. You're not going to hit a point of acceptance and never look back but once you've gotten there it gets so much easier to get back there again. I came on here to spout more bullshit about stereotypes about how women dress and wear makeup to impress men when really they do it to make them feel good about themselves because I am a firm believer in that. But, as I got writing I realised what I was saying and I found holes. I'd be lying to myself if I said that I did, because yeah I like the way I look but that is because I think others will like it. It is really all just a big circle. As I said, its human nature to want people to like us, we have a deep seeded need to belong. You can tell from this post the tossing and turning we have with this ideal. I have gone from wanting people to love me, to loving myself and back again. It is the way it is, it is not going to change, acceptance is the key.
I think the point that I'm trying to make is: teenagers, stop stressing, what you are going through is natural, you will love yourself eventually and you can sure as hell believe you wont all over again. Just cop it. If you can look in the mirror one day and say dayyymmmn I actually look good and then the next want to smash the mirror it is okay. Some people will like you and some won't. You can't say you like everyone so why do you expect anything different from them. Remember: YOU ARE HUMAN.
Tip 4: Let life take its course. The universe will throw all sorts of things at you. Deal with them as they come, tomorrow is a new day.
Well that's me signing off,
I might come back some day... Bye for now
Flower
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